Monday, November 29, 2010

News Around Town/Kouri's is Now Officially on the Shitlist

A couple quick bits of news. First, in case you've been living under a rock, an awesomely bad robbery took place last week at Agatucci's. The owners pulled out their pieces, chased the would-be robber into the street, where shots were fired and (in my mind's eye) the owners said something bad ass like "the next time you pull that shit, I'll stick my gun up your ass and pull the trigger till it goes click," or something like that.

Secondly, I heard a rumor that the owners of the Elbo Room (and now, apparently, the Sports Page) will close the Elbo and move their operations to Sports Page. Also, a friend of the PBR recently admitted to drunkenly ripping the toilet in the men's bathroom at Elbo Room from its moorings several years ago. This could explain why every time I go in there, it looks like the Great Deluge and not the kind Raoul Duke would approve of. Despite the fact that the facilities at Elbo Room resemble a public restroom in NYC, I always have a good time at that place and get quick and friendly service. The same cannot be said for a certain north Peoria bar called Kouri's.

If you weren't aware, Kouri's (formerly Mulligan's) has been reviewed by the PBR before and the results weren't that great. Now, I can officially put Kouri's on the shitlist for several reasons.

1. Douchebags
The place was filled with them, no more needs to be said on this topic.

2. Crappy service
Upon entering Kouri's I stepped up to the outside bar where I was ignored by several members of the wait-staff until finally the bartender gave me (half) his attention. While he looked over the top of my head, I ordered a pitcher and some shots. The drinks came and he blurted out the total. No, "did you want to run a tab?" just the total. He may as well have said "give me your fucking money and don't bother me until you're out of booze and I can get more of your money." That's exactly the way I felt. The best part? He didn't even give me glasses to go with the pitcher, I had to ask for them. How in The Fuck am I supposed to drink a pitcher without a glass? It would be one thing if it were just me but apparently people don't like to drink out of the same  receptacle.

3. Ridiculously expensive drinks
$8.50 for a pitcher, 'nuff said

That's all for now folks! Be sure to leave your hate in the comments section, it's the only thing that keeps this site going.